50 ways to be kind to yourself

Learn how to treat yourself with true compassion, here’s a plethora of kindness ideas to try.  

Most of the time we tend to put others first, but why shouldn’t you treat yourself as you treat your friends, family and colleagues? Be extra nice to yourself today by flexing your self-compassion muscle. Not sure where to begin? We listed 50 ideas that are easy and simple to incorporate into your daily routines for some much-needed self-love. Take a deep dive into the power of being kind to yourself and learn how to boost your confidence, energy and more with a little self-compassion. 


  1. Change ‘must’ into ‘may’

In our lives we often feel like we ‘must’ do many things. We must be caring, funny, successful, stylish, and so on. Be kind to yourself by turning all the musts into mays, and you will feel less stressed in the blink of an eye.


  1. Listen to your body

Do you need a warm bath? A refreshing stroll in the park? A piece of chocolate? Listen to what your body is telling you. Listen to it whispering, so it doesn't have to scream.


  1. Surround yourself with lovely things

Soft fabrics, beautiful scented candles, your most beautiful (and comfortable) clothes... Transform your house into a home, you’ll be surprised how good you feel when you pay attention to yourself and your surroundings in this way. 


  1. Do something that makes you laugh

Whether it's watching that funny feel-good movie or playing Risk with your friends., do something that makes you smile. Laughing relaxes you, helpsyou produce stress-reducing and pain-relieving hormones and is also good for your immune system.


  1. Bring your attention to your heart

Our hearts literally symbolise ‘love’. Give love to yourself by bringing your attention to your heart and sending lots of love to it. Heal your heart with this yoga flow. 

  1. Surprise yourself with something sweet

And that doesn't even have to be something material (it may be, but not necessarily). Making time for yourself can also be a gift of self-compassion. Cooking your favourite dish, switching your mobile phone off (!), reading a book on the couch, or taking a warming bath with candles and your favourite bubbles. Just attention, from you, for you.


  1. Practice gratitude

Write down three experiences, people or things you are grateful for every day and why. It doesn’t matter how big or small they are, it may even be that you enjoyed a bird singing whilst having your morning coffee. The more you focus on gratitude, the more joyful you will feel.  


  1. You are what you believe

So, if you believe that you are insecure, then you are insecure. Learn new beliefs. It's all in the mind. Believe that you can cleanse yourself of negative thoughts. Believe that you are great. Believe that anything is possible.


  1. Celebrate your successes

Whether it is because the walls that you painted are glorious, or you didn’t hit snooze this morning, celebrate your personal successes and treat yourself when you’ve accomplished something that is important to you. 


  1. I’m proud of…

Before you close your eyes and drift off to dreamland, write down something you are proud of every day.


  1. Be extra relaxed

No, you certainly don't have to be perfect (in fact, there is no such thing as perfection). Things don't go the way as you’ve planned? Oh well. Be kind to yourself and focus on feeling relaxed even in the chaos and stress of every day. It teaches you that you are good enough and that not that many things are worth stressing out about, no matter how things turn out. 


  1. Turn your negative thoughts around

Everyone really does have an inner critic. You know, the little voice in your head that says you can you’re not good enough, smart enough? It is also the voice that makes you believe that you have made a fool of yourself when someone does not immediately respond to your message or email. Turn that negative voice into a positive one, by consciously saying something positive to yourself when you feel inferior. 


  1. Find a sport you really love doing

We don't need to tell you that exercise is good for your body, mind and soul. However, have you considered framing exercise as a form of 'self-love'?  That's right: if you see exercise as a punishment, it won't be self-love for you. But did you know that you can turn this around very easily? Make it as fun as it can be, for example by playing your favourite tunes and dancing around your living room. And if you are a sporty spice at heart, find something you enjoy doing whether that’s tennis, rowing or something else that makes you feel good.


  1. Do a social media detox

Many of us have become so used to posting everything we do, like, see and experience on social media. Give yourself a little self-love by reducing your screen time. Most of us get the feeling that our lives are less fun and spontaneous than others. This doesn’t do any good for your mindset. So, let go of the phone once in a while. 


  1. Meditate every day

For some people who have never meditated before, sitting with your eyes closed for 15 minutes doesn’t sound fun at all. How can you think of nothing at all? Fortunately, meditation does not require that. It is about realising that your thoughts are always wandering and meditating simply helps you to bring your mind into the here and now. Meditating has a lot of advantages: your concentration improves, you become less frustrated and less stressed. Sounds like… Self-love! You can explore our selection of meditations here, find one that speaks to you and give it a try. 

  1. Set boundaries

It is better for your soul when you say no to things that are no good for you. So, say no to things that exhaust you or are emotionally draining.


  1. Stop rejecting yourself

There is nothing wrong with you, you are the only one in the world who continuously contradicts that.


  1. Do not worry

Do not think about all the negative things that could happen. Create a positive image of the future. You will notice that positive thoughts immediately make you feel much better.


  1. Stop judging

Accept yourself as you are. When you get up in the morning, try saying the following mantra to yourself in the mirror: I am good enough, just as I am.


  1. Cherish loving thoughts

By paying attention to your loving thoughts, your self-love grows. So be kind to yourself and treat yourself as you would your best friend.


  1. Forgive yourself

Let go of the past. You did things with the knowledge and experience that you had at the time. Now you might do things differently, accept this and let go of it. You have grown and changed. So let go of the past and forgive yourself. 


  1. Be mindful

Be aware of who you are, what you feel and want. People with a lot of self-love act based on who they are and where their heart lies.


  1. Receive compliments as a king or queen

Let a compliment really sink in by saying 'thank you' instead of questioning it.  


  1. Learn how to value yourself

Self-love also means finding yourself valuable enough to be able to receive love and happiness. Only when you feel that you too are valuable, you are able to go where you really want to go. Because then you allow yourself to give and receive what you need and long for!


  1. Connect to your breathing

Real self-love is not only in your head, but also in your body. Calm your mind and ego by connecting to your breathing. Learn to listen to your body by practicing breathing exercises. In this way you create peace and a deep trust.

  1. Do a body scan

The body scan is a great tool for more self-confidence and self-love, it helps you to notice your emotions and the chemical processes in your body. Take a moment to lie down and focus your attention to each part of your body from head to toe, and notice how each part of you feels. Your thoughts create all kinds of feelings in your body. As soon as you learn to connect with your body, your head will calm down more quickly and your body will follow.


  1. Reduce the ideal image

The greater the distance from your ideal image of yourself and the real one, the more insecure you will feel. Which brings us to...


  1. You can't turn an apple into a pear

Sometimes it is good to take a step back, to reflect and then to accept that some things are the way they are. You can’t turn an apple into a pear and a fish on dry land is also unfortunate. You have your own colour and shape, embrace and accept them.


  1. Must reads

Do you like to read? Try the following books, they will support you in your journey of how to be kinder to yourself: 

- Practising The Power Of Now by Eckhart Tolle

- Awaken the Giant Within by Tony Robbins

- What a time to be alone by Chidera Eggerue

- Self Love Talk by Merel Teunis

- You Are A Badass by Jen Sincero


  1. Give yourself a foot massage

Start by placing the palm of your hand on your toes of one foot and push the toes downwards. Place your thumbs together in the middle of the sole of the foot, wrap your fingers across. Rub your index finger up and down between the joints with light pressure. 


  1. Netflix and chill

This one may seem obvious, but it works oh so well. Hop into something comfy, place your favourite snacks within reach and watch the series you enjoy the most.


  1. Mistakes are growth

Allow yourself to make mistakes, they are part of your never-ending journey to grow as a person. Mistakes are part of life and you limit yourself if you try desperately not to make any.


  1. Powerwalking

Nothing gives you more energy than a refreshing hike in a forest, on the beach or in a park. So put on your outdoor shoes, inhale deeply and give yourself some self-love by placing one foot in front of the other for at least 30 minutes.

  1. Kundalini Yoga

Take extra good care of yourself today by cultivating more self-love with this Kundalini yoga posture:

-       Sit down with crossed legs. Grab your ankles.

-       Inhale and make a hollow back, keeping your head straight and shoulders back.

-      Exhale and slowly round your back. Bringing your attention between your eyebrows. 

-       Slowly sit back up straight.

-       Repeat 5 times, taking it slow.


  1. Flower power

Take a stroll to the market or your local florist and treat yourself to a beautiful bouquet of flowers. They will not only bring a smile to your face, but also happy vibes to your living room!


  1. Keep on learning

Continue to develop yourself, both personally and professionally. Sign up for a Spanish course or join an Ayurvedic cooking class. Trust us, you will feel great about yourself when learning new skills.


  1. Dress up

Did you know that our emotions are strongly connected to clothing? Be kind to yourself and dress up every now and then (maybe it is your favourite dress, or your pair of ‘killer’ heels) to feel amazing! 


  1. Dishes that will lighten you up

We all have that one dish that makes us happy just thinking of it. Awaken your inner chef and prepare yourself your favourite plate of comfort food tonight. Maybe accompanied with a glass of delicious wine to give your soul an extra big hug.


  1. Laugh

Laughter is very good for you. Watch your favourite funny movie, TV series or comedian. Or, better still, give a friend a call and reminisce about funny moments you shared in the past.


  1. Vitamin D for free

Vitamin D stimulates the production of the 'happy' hormone serotonin, which - you guessed it - does wonders for your mood. So, when your intake of this crucial vitamin is low, you're much more vulnerable to feeling down. Go outside, soak up the sun and give yourself a natural boost or, if the sun is in hiding, try supplementing. 


  1. Put yourself first

This one can feel a bit difficult in the beginning, but we promise that you will get better at it as you practice. Make choices that will make you happy, even if it means that you must disappoint others sometimes. Remember: you can only share positivity if you are genuinely feeling happy.


  1. Follow your heart

Follow your heart, rather than your mind or the voice in your head telling you to do something else (your ego). Deep down you probably know what the right choice is.


  1. Dream big

Dare to dream big. Do not limit yourself with the thought that you cannot do something, or the idea that something is not feasible. If you dare to dream big, all possibilities are open. Extra bonus: you immediately feel much better about yourself!


  1. Concentrate on what you can control

It is a waste of your precious time and energy to focus on things that you can’t change, for example, the weather or a delayed train. Concentrate on things in your own life that you do have control over.


  1. You rock!

Realise that you do not need approval from others to be yourself. Because no matter what others think: you are fine absolutely fine the way you are!


  1. Surround yourself with good people

Sometimes it is useful to take a closer look at your group of friends. From whom do you get energy, and can you learn from? Since we are all growing on a personal level, it can happen that you don’t speak the same language anymore. Surround yourself with good people and maintain relationships with those people who are open, honest and supportive. 


  1. Podcast

Not in the mood for talking? Then put on your headphones and listen to an inspiring podcast. 


  1. Calling a loved one

Pick up your phone and call a friend of relative that you haven’t spoken to in a while. You can perfectly combine this one with an energising walk in the park.


  1. View old photographs

Get your old photo books out of the closet and sit down with something nice to drink. Take a deep dive into the past and recall all the beautiful, precious moments with friends and family. This makes you feel happy instantly.


  1. Doing nothing at all

Last, but certainly not least, be kind to yourself by doing absolutely nothing at all.

Sometimes life can feel hectic, and we all have filled agendas. Take a comfortable seat or lie down, close your eyes and just enjoy being in the moment.


This summer, invite kindness into your life, share it with others and discover how to treat the world with kindness too. Visit our Kindness Community page and explore a wealth of content that will inspire positivity and good vibes for yourself, others and the world.

Anouk Ballering

Anouk Ballering

Anouk Ballering is a storyteller at heart with 5 years of experience in PR. By creating stories and activations that are relatable and relevant she has revealed the soul of luxurious lifestyle brands including the W Hotel, VICE, de Bijenkorf and Timberland. When she is not doing HIIT or Rocycle, you can find her on a yoga mat. She is passionate about yoga and living mindfully, because she believes that we all need some well-deserved balance in our lives to be the best version of ourselves.